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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/19/2009 9:39:47 AM
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ppodmama
Posts: 373
Joined: 10/31/2008
From: Midwest
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Mark,
Did you take the love language quiz yet? You could direct your wife to do the same thing. Ask her how you can love her better too. Tell her you want to love her better.
Then you could propose to her again, telling her you'd love a clean slate to start all over with and renew your vows when you get home. Then possibly start sending her a love letter every day, telling her what you love about her., even if it's just "I love your laugh" or things like that.
I keep praying. You stay hopeful!
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/19/2009 11:17:40 AM
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mark_2006
Posts: 46
Joined: 11/3/2009
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ppodmama
Mark,
Did you take the love language quiz yet? You could direct your wife to do the same thing. Ask her how you can love her better too. Tell her you want to love her better.
Then you could propose to her again, telling her you'd love a clean slate to start all over with and renew your vows when you get home. Then possibly start sending her a love letter every day, telling her what you love about her., even if it's just "I love your laugh" or things like that.
I keep praying. You stay hopeful!
I have taken the Love Language quiz. And i have realized, she is Quality time together, and Physical Touch. But, Sadly I can't do that, while I'm here, and i probably will never get that chance, because she is so committed, on letting the devil win.
She has said I've lost everything. And I don't know why she doesn't want to put her faith in God, and help us have a great marriage.
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/19/2009 9:57:50 PM
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ppodmama
Posts: 373
Joined: 10/31/2008
From: Midwest
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Mark, what did you end up with as your love language?
Also, while it's true you can't provide that for her right now, you can communicate that you understand that now, recall and recount times when you were able to, along with how much those things count as blessings to you, that you wish you had known these things before and your hopes to do those things in the future.
Focus on what can be done and what God can hold together!
Rooting for you in every way...(including prayer)
ppodmama
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/20/2009 1:08:27 AM
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mark_2006
Posts: 46
Joined: 11/3/2009
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My love language is Words of Affirmation.
But she has done nothing, but say negative things about me.
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/20/2009 7:47:54 AM
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seagullplayer
Posts: 332
Joined: 9/18/2007
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You should have left well enough alone when you had her on your side; she was going to let you come home for the Holidays. This daily bickering back and forth is childish and not productive in the least.
You need to give this some time.
You have my prayers.
_____________________________
The world has only one problem, sin.
There is only one solution, Jesus.
Seems a lot of people watch evangelist on TV and call it going to church.
My kids use to play Mario Cart and think they where driving…
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/20/2009 9:42:46 AM
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ppodmama
Posts: 373
Joined: 10/31/2008
From: Midwest
Status: offline
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Don't give up hope Mark. I know it is so difficult because you are apart from her. Have you asked God to be Lord of your marriage and of the kind of husband you are and then entrusting your wife to Him that same way.
Billy Graham's wife's quote is priceless here.
"It's my job to love Billy. It's God's job to make him good."
You are always in control of your love for her and prayer can assure that you are doing what you need to, realizing you can't make her do anything.
I keep praying....you keep hanging in there!
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/20/2009 11:57:44 AM
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spotnapp
Posts: 52
Joined: 7/19/2009
Status: online
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Still praying for your marriage and your safe return! Thank you again for the service you are doing for our country!!
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/20/2009 2:08:55 PM
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mark_2006
Posts: 46
Joined: 11/3/2009
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ppodmama
Don't give up hope Mark. I know it is so difficult because you are apart from her. Have you asked God to be Lord of your marriage and of the kind of husband you are and then entrusting your wife to Him that same way.
Billy Graham's wife's quote is priceless here.
"It's my job to love Billy. It's God's job to make him good."
You are always in control of your love for her and prayer can assure that you are doing what you need to, realizing you can't make her do anything.
I keep praying....you keep hanging in there!
That is a great quote. I wish my wife could see this. And take things to heart. But I have no idea, where her heart is, and where her faith is.
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RE: Deployed Solider Looking For Advice. - 11/20/2009 2:22:12 PM
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ppodmama
Posts: 373
Joined: 10/31/2008
From: Midwest
Status: offline
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mark, I know it's hard, but that faith stuff is between her and, God focus on what you CAN do. It's tough, I won't lie. I struggle with my own things too. But focusing on what you can't do probably just makes you more anxious than anything. I know you want her to pick up her end of the stick, and she should. But it's gonna be up to God and her when and if she will. So back to the quote...What CAN YOU do today to express your love? And, like dropping off a gift from a secret admirer, do your loving thing and run off.....
try it.
Could you use a good belly laugh right now, just for a breather?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17PEUZvoxho
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