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I Don't Understand - 10/24/2009 7:55:59 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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There is a man in my life whom I love with all my heart... We are not dating nor have we, but we've spent hours talking and laughing... We've talked hopes and dreams and the past and the future.. I feel that I know him pretty well, and him me... We had a major misunderstanding several years ago that parted us for months, but...prayers, patience and genuine love brought us back together... He has said we're just friends that he treasures me as his friend and I really accept that... I'm not asking for romance or marriage from him.. (though I admit, I can't help but wish.) We talked on the phone and through email etc. up until about 5-6 months ago.. NOW--nothing--NADA but...when we see each other it's like it's always been.. Can someone TELL me why he's doing this... I've asked him several times, IF I have said or done something to warrant this, and NO reply... Honestly--it's really killing me... I don't know what to think... I don't -nor have I ever pressed him for anything... Like I said, I love him, and I want to be in his life, IF only as his friend... Please give me some ideas.... I don't know and I want to... He doesn't take my calls when I call nor answer my emails... If he wants me out of his life--he's about to get his wish... I'll never forget him, and I'm too old to go through this again...
BTW neither of us have been married and I have told him that should he marry someone else, I would support him... (I didn't tell him, but it sure would be the hardest thing I've ever done in my life...) But I love him enough to want to see him happy, and he needs someone....
< Message edited by 2joyful -- 10/24/2009 8:08:00 PM >
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/24/2009 9:46:35 PM
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makarizo
Posts: 2512
Joined: 4/13/2005
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this probably isn't your situation at all, but sounds similar to something that happened in my life a few years ago.. I had a friend, a very good friend, safe supportive, true, and just a friend. and then I started a relationship with someone else who got a little ballistic over the idea of me having such a good female friend, so even tho I was very fond of her, and never thought of her as less than a friend, I sorta shut her out.
I learned a big lesson in all of that.
I didn't call her, or respond to her....... didn't really want to talk about it with her because I thought it was a little silly/embarrassing ..... indeed I really wasn't thinking at all.
after the relationship ended, I started calling her again...... to apologize and explain.... she thanked me for that, and for the opportunity to get some closure on the whole thing and asked me to never call her again.
I understand why she did that, but I still don't understand why I did what I did. It was a huge learning experience that won't happen again.
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/24/2009 10:54:56 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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Well that could be it I suppose, but to my knowledge, he isn't dating anyone... There is a woman who chases him all over the place, but he has said they were just friends... But maybe they're more than that... Thanks for your input.... Like I said I'm thisclose to telling him good riddance and I'll never bother you again, and you won't have to worry about me.. I've stood with him through some pretty serious stuff and I miss him, but, I'm not going to allow him to keep doing this....Thanks again for your response...
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/25/2009 3:02:25 AM
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rockominal
Posts: 664
Joined: 8/15/2007
From: Indiana
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I kinda wish everything was this easy, so to speak. Someone would have to be pretty lame not to feel your end in all of this. Is he part of the clergy that precludes any kind of relationship? I can read through this and I'm not exactly romantically dense. Otherwise, he is. What you have put out here is enough to fill a basket for a couple of wedding gifts or something. Unless he has kids that don't like you or you already have kids that don't like him, then it's engagement time with a definate marriage date, and nothing less.
question: Are you seeing someone right now? Just ask that if you haven't already. "Are you sure?"
I know a girl that I won't forget either. These feelings just don't come and go. I guess she likes to be around me sometimes and talk because her boy wasn't interested for some reason. But I don't have the time to get involved too much. The touch and go thing just doesn't work and I think it's about time for you to go. You can't just tap into some romantic feelings now and then. You have to get the complete package, good and bad, or nothing at all.
_____________________________
I might tell you the truth, or something pretty close to it. Jesus says, "I Am the Truth."
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/25/2009 8:36:00 AM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rockominal
I kinda wish everything was this easy, so to speak. Someone would have to be pretty lame not to feel your end in all of this. Is he part of the clergy that precludes any kind of relationship? I can read through this and I'm not exactly romantically dense. Otherwise, he is. What you have put out here is enough to fill a basket for a couple of wedding gifts or something. Unless he has kids that don't like you or you already have kids that don't like him, then it's engagement time with a definate marriage date, and nothing less.
question: Are you seeing someone right now? Just ask that if you haven't already. "Are you sure?"
I know a girl that I won't forget either. These feelings just don't come and go. I guess she likes to be around me sometimes and talk because her boy wasn't interested for some reason. But I don't have the time to get involved too much. The touch and go thing just doesn't work and I think it's about time for you to go. You can't just tap into some romantic feelings now and then. You have to get the complete package, good and bad, or nothing at all.
rockominal, I think I understand what you're saying... That I should just let go and walk away???? and I am about to do this.. It is really going to be hard to do... I've loved him for several years and I wouldn't admit it even to myself for a long time.... I can't just keep going on the way it is.... It hurts too much to keep hoping and then nothing...
Thank you very much for your reply, and I ask that you remember me in your prayers as this will take a lot of courage and strength that I really don't have in the natural... No Iam not dating anyone nor do I have children.... His family and I get along fabulously and this is something that I've wanted for years and years... It's really difficult to let go and just walk away from someone whom I love so much..
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/25/2009 6:10:45 PM
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MWD
Posts: 100
Joined: 8/23/2006
From: New Hampshire
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I think some of the reason you're stuck is that you haven't defined in your own mind (or, perhaps, admitted to yourself) exactly what you want from him -- what sort of future you see with him. Because of that, you're stuck in a rut, playing a passive, wait-and-see role, letting his situation at any given time define yours. I think a contributing factor is your stated willingness to support him should he marry someone else. I think you know deep down that would not be possible, given your feelings for him.
My second point is that his failures to communicate constitute a total lack of basic civility. I get better treatment from the guy who does my motorcycle inspections. Basic civility is a sine qua non of any relationship. On that metric alone, in my view, he has already failed as a potential husband, not to mention as a friend.
1. Decide what you really and truly want from him. Keep that image in your mind constantly, to the exclusion of any false, "settle-for" or "Plan B" goals. It'll give you something hard and well-defined to work toward.
2. Assign a drop-dead date for what you want from him to happen.
3. If it doesn't happen by that date, then reach over your head and cut the puppet strings, walk away, and stay away.
Yes, tough to do, but if it turns out negative, the pain of ending it will last for only a short time, and then you'll be fine. Today, by contrast, you're allowing yourself to be slowly bled dry. Ask yourself where you want to be by the beginning of 2010. I suggest either a fully-committed romantic relationship, or nothing. But certainly not anticipating another year of the "same old."
Good luck.
_____________________________
Wayne Brighthall
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/25/2009 9:33:40 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MWD
I think some of the reason you're stuck is that you haven't defined in your own mind (or, perhaps, admitted to yourself) exactly what you want from him -- what sort of future you see with him. Because of that, you're stuck in a rut, playing a passive, wait-and-see role, letting his situation at any given time define yours. I think a contributing factor is your stated willingness to support him should he marry someone else. I think you know deep down that would not be possible, given your feelings for him.
My second point is that his failures to communicate constitute a total lack of basic civility. I get better treatment from the guy who does my motorcycle inspections. Basic civility is a sine qua non of any relationship. On that metric alone, in my view, he has already failed as a potential husband, not to mention as a friend.
1. Decide what you really and truly want from him. Keep that image in your mind constantly, to the exclusion of any false, "settle-for" or "Plan B" goals. It'll give you something hard and well-defined to work toward.
2. Assign a drop-dead date for what you want from him to happen.
3. If it doesn't happen by that date, then reach over your head and cut the puppet strings, walk away, and stay away.
Yes, tough to do, but if it turns out negative, the pain of ending it will last for only a short time, and then you'll be fine. Today, by contrast, you're allowing yourself to be slowly bled dry. Ask yourself where you want to be by the beginning of 2010. I suggest either a fully-committed romantic relationship, or nothing. But certainly not anticipating another year of the "same old."
Good luck.
I had such high hopes and expectations for 2009, it started out so well, and like I said the last 5-6 months--nothing... But..you have given me something to think about... I want to marry him more than anything that I've ever wanted... To be his support his helpmate and to be his... You are absolutely right IF he married someone else, I couldn't hang around, I'd have to go... I couldn't deal with that... It makes me angry that he can't hit reply on an email and say, "hey, all is well, I'm busy, I'll talk to you later..".Or to at least return my calls... But NADA for months... As I said, you've given me a lot to think about, and I appreciate you guys and your input... IF there is anyone in YOUR life---don't do this to her...
< Message edited by 2joyful -- 10/25/2009 9:41:14 PM >
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/26/2009 6:28:03 AM
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rockominal
Posts: 664
Joined: 8/15/2007
From: Indiana
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quote:
ORIGINAL: 2joyful
rockominal, I think I understand what you're saying... That I should just let go and walk away???? and I am about to do this.. It is really going to be hard to do... I've loved him for several years and I wouldn't admit it even to myself for a long time.... I can't just keep going on the way it is.... It hurts too much to keep hoping and then nothing...
Thank you very much for your reply, and I ask that you remember me in your prayers as this will take a lot of courage and strength that I really don't have in the natural... No Iam not dating anyone nor do I have children.... His family and I get along fabulously and this is something that I've wanted for years and years... It's really difficult to let go and just walk away from someone whom I love so much..
I had hoped that there was more to my post besides relegating it to "it's over, or walking away. When I think love shouldn't be wasted, I also include pain in that. Yours has too much substance to have propagated to this point. It's a beautiful thing, I mean including the pain, but it can't be shared. It's like a box of diamonds thrown out on the ground. You might recover a couple of the diamonds while many of them get trampled deeper into the ground where nobody will ever see them again. My point is the this fear and pain (of breaking it off) tells me more about you than this guy or anybody else. Of course it is unbearable, not for him, but for you. Take heed, because I think there is a certain physical toll that this can take. Not just emotional or psychological (I don't like psychiatry), but physical. Sometimes I've been so tired of things in general that I just don't feel up to caring about much.
It's too bad that you are limited to being at one plac on the map at any given moment. I don't really get out that much because I don't feel like it. But you have this "thing" inside of you and it's being poured out, and yet bottled up, in such a confined area. The hideous part is that there is more than one guy out there who would cherish that whole gamut of love and pain you have to offer like gold. He's out there, you can count on it, if there is any shred of humanity left. We are both limited by our surroundings and simply don't know who that is.
I hate to use such a simple analogy, but it's like pouring water in a lake for the fish when there is a flower up on the hill withering because a lack of water.
_____________________________
I might tell you the truth, or something pretty close to it. Jesus says, "I Am the Truth."
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/26/2009 2:03:14 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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Rock thank you!!! and the others too... I have made up my mind not to email him or call him anymore until I hear from him... I had stopped sending him anything that wasn't uplifting and now I am just going to stop that... He is a busy man, but it doesn't take but a few seconds to reply to an email... People DO what they WANT to... Thanks again...
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/26/2009 4:00:25 PM
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rockominal
Posts: 664
Joined: 8/15/2007
From: Indiana
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I, for one, am very happy to hear that! At this point, you've already poured more than enough water into that lake. 
_____________________________
I might tell you the truth, or something pretty close to it. Jesus says, "I Am the Truth."
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/26/2009 6:27:37 PM
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_Don_
Posts: 105
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From: Close enough to the mountains.
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It is hard to say what is going on here not knowing either of you and not knowing the story of your relationship as it could be any number of things...but, I'll try to help and raise some questions for you... I agree with MWD that you are finding your situation hard to understand as you haven't (hadn't) really clarified your relationship with him yourself. This is what I distilled from your first post:
You love a man with whom you are friends and he's said that you are just friends and you are happy with being just friends but you want more from the relationship than just friends even though you're not asking for more than just friends from this guy who is, recently, not acting like a friend except for when you see each other.
I find that confusing. It is good you have clarified that you want to be more than friends now but what does that mean for both you and him? If you have been confused about your relationship is there any chance he is confused too? Could you have been sending conflicting signals to him about your availability for more than a friendship?
Have you had a relationship defining conversation with him? If not, I think it'd help even if you initiated it. Confronting him and finally finding out his feelings (or lack thereof) for you would help you immensely and you can finally move on if he really really only sees you as a friend (I find imbalanced one-person-loves-the-other friendships don't work well). Considering the circumstances I'd have the conversation in person too if at all possible (Go for coffee somewhere). Really, I think if he was interested in you then he should have approached you ages ago and expressed interest despite any confusion regarding the relationship on his part. You can judge better though whether or not he is the kind of guy that'd do that...
If he already recognises that you want more than a friendship then his lack of response to your calls and emails could be his way of keeping the friendship at a level with which he is comfortable. He should have acknowledged your communication in some way even if just to convey this but not knowing him I can't say why he couldn't or wouldn't.
It seems as if he wants a friendship and considers you a friend given his reaction to you when he sees you but, he wants to keep you at certain distance at the same time. Asking him several times whether or not you've done anything to offend him and continuing to communicate with him despite his silence might convey desperation and desperation often scares guys off. Showing an appropriate level of interest can be a tricky balance and signals often get crossed. That's why I think the relationship defining conversation is an important one. Also, some guy friendships are just like that...little communication for long intervals but instant reconnection when reunited. Perhaps he is just treating you just like his other guy friends? It is rude for him not to respond to your communication but if he treats everyone else like that too then that's just who he is and what he does. Again, you know him so should be able to judge whether or not he is treating you any differently...
...You mention things changing 5 or 6 months ago...anything change in his or your life or friendship then? He may be going through some difficulty/crisis/problem/lack of confidence/terminal illness/whatever. No excuse for not communicating really but perhaps he has other things on his mind...
Anyway, you've said you've decided to stop communicating with him but, as you still love him I'd suggest you find a way to talk to him about your relationship just to put your mind at rest. Otherwise, the question will likely always be in the back of your mind. Talking to him directly is the best and quickest way to put your mind at rest and move on either way.
_____________________________
quote:
ORIGINAL: Fry
I can't wait 'till I'm old enough to feel ways about stuff.
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/26/2009 8:23:25 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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quote:
You love a man with whom you are friends and he's said that you are just friends and you are happy with being just friends but you want more from the relationship than just friends even though you're not asking for more than just friends from this guy who is, recently, not acting like a friend except for when you see each other.
I never realized it before, but this is exactly how feel, and exactly how I've probably communicated to him... Thank you for helping me to see this... yes, I do need to sit down and talk to him, and I'm going to see him soon, and I hope to get to do that very thing... IF we can catch a few minutes alone... Maybe I don't know what I want myself... NO... I do know what I want... I want to marry him more than anything that I know..... And I can see where maybe that he could see that there is some desperation there... I'm not really, or I hope I'm not.... I do have a full plate of friends.... I don't sit at home waiting for him to call... I don't date--as there is not anyone that I know that I even want to but him.. but I stay busy with friends... (male and female) He has found out in the last six months or so that he is a diabetic, and I thought he was dealing with that very well... I don't know, maybe no... but I've got a lot to think over and plan to do before I see him again next weekend... thanks again for ALL of YOUR input...
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/26/2009 10:59:41 PM
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ajlewis
Posts: 117
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: State of Confusion
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quote:
We talked on the phone and through email etc. up until about 5-6 months ago.. NOW--nothing--NADA This exact same thing has happened more than once to me with women - one of the reasons I've never been married.
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/27/2009 1:22:53 AM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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AJ, I can honestly say, I'm sorry and I know exactly how you feel... It's tough isn't it???? I really and truly don't like games, head games or whatever... And IF that is what I've been doing, I'm going to rectify that quickly... Hopefully one day you can find someone that is the same way... GOD BLESS YA!!!!
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/27/2009 3:14:36 AM
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_Don_
Posts: 105
Joined: 5/13/2007
From: Close enough to the mountains.
Status: offline
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2joyful, there's a thread you might want to check out in the Singles forum on an article regarding uncommitted close friendships between members of the opposite sex. The address is http://forums.christianity.com/About_buddies%25%25%25%25%25%25%25/m_4584724/mpage_1/tm.htm. I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on the article too.
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Fry
I can't wait 'till I'm old enough to feel ways about stuff.
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/27/2009 3:05:31 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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wow, that was hard to read... I think that any single man/woman can be friends, but....I think it needs to be limited to a small amount of contact... That way--no one gets any ideas... I don't think there should be any type of "touching" no hand holding or a lot of embracing the other one...or dating involved... I see no excuse for it... If you want to keep it on the "buddy" system you have to treat it just as you would your same sex friends...Once that opposite sex step is stepped over--then someone is bound to get hurt.... Just my opinion!!!! Spending hours on the phone or together, will certainly give anyone the idea that there is something there... Even to outsiders I think they would agree with that also...
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/29/2009 3:38:57 AM
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rockominal
Posts: 664
Joined: 8/15/2007
From: Indiana
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quote:
ORIGINAL: 2joyful
Maybe I don't know what I want myself... NO... I do know what I want... I want to marry him more than anything that I know..... And I can see where maybe that he could see that there is some desperation there... I'm not really, or I hope I'm not....
Hold it right there. I watch Dr. Phil sometimes because I'm bored and nothing else is on TV. I've been sucker punched with blanket terminology such as despiration, co-dependency, and such. But sometimes I get to see this clinical tripe for what it is. Being in love with someone is awkward. It's not something that is supposed to be regulated and put in a zoned area.
You've never been engaged or married to this guy. He is busy most of the time. Let's start there. When he's around other people he's thinking about you if not fantasizing about being with you. If he's not, something is wrong. It's a burning in his gut that no one else see's and he really doesn't want anyone else to see it. It's something you feel. When he's away from you during the daily doldrums and agony of trying to survive, the comforting thought he has is that "Wow. I have somebody out there in the midst of all this that wants me". He doesn't call you because, if he does, he's afraid he might spoil the romantic encounter that you will have when you finally get together. In other words, he doesn't want to spoil the suprise. When he finally gets you alone and you're out somewhere, he's on cloud nine. It radiates off him like a car engine shut down after it's been running hot. There's no need to talk about it because it's blatantly obvious. If he's with you at night he wonders if you will sleep with him or just go to a motel. You might say no, but it doesn't matter because that's what he's thinking. He's not sure if he's going to be able to pull himself away from you and go home. Maybe there's something else he can say to keep stalling. When he finally leaves, he goes home or wherever, still in a daze. He's glad when you have fun with him, and doesn't ever forget those moments.. Sometimes he get's this nervous anxiety when he's around you. It doesn't really matter, because he get's the same nervous anxiety when he's not around you, fantasizing about the next time you are going to be together. He wonders to himself, "how on earth did I finally luck out like this? This is too good to be true."
Does that sound like desperation? I have a newsflash: If he doesn't feel like that, something is WRONG. It's not something you discuss. It's not something you scrutinize like studying a bug in a jar. It's not something you go to a website and "learn" about. It's not something you can put into perspective. It's not something that Dr. Phil can run his mouth about. It's not something you can sanitize. It's not something you can understand. It is something that is just there. It should be beaming off of him like radar. It doesn't lend itself to discussion nor should it.
quote:
ORIGINAL: 2joyful
I don't sit at home waiting for him to call... I don't date--as there is not anyone that I know that I even want to but him.. but I stay busy with friends... (male and female)
And that gets back to what I said about being limited by our surroundings. That's the helpless part in all of this. Don't get me wrong, friends are good to have. In other ways, that environmental circle can be like a noose around your neck. It's not a matter of thinking outside the box. We can do that. It's a matter of physically being able to get out of the box.
_____________________________
I might tell you the truth, or something pretty close to it. Jesus says, "I Am the Truth."
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/30/2009 3:05:02 AM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
Status: offline
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Rockminal, This is how I thought he felt, until he stopped all communication with me... He is an evangelist and a few months ago I went to a church where he was ministering and I was very late getting there.... Some really good friends of mine told me that they knew the minute that I walked in... His smile and his whole demeanor changed... They were sitting up front of the church and had no idea when I arrived... So I kind of have to believe them... A few weeks before that I was with him in church and after the service and I was talking to him, and after I walked off, he came up to me and grabbed me and kissed me on the cheek... Before I could recover, he had walked on... I was going to tell him, he missed... but he had gone on... See this was the whole purpose of this thread... I don't understand why he has done the things he has... When he's not near me, in fact he can be hundreds of miles away, and I can feel his presence... So strong that I can reach out and touch him... So to speak... I want him to make a MOVE and lets get the show on the road IF that is the way it's going... I'm tired of waiting, and hoping and not having answers... But as I said in an above post, he could be confused by my actions... BUT I will clear that up someway... Even IF I tell him I love him, and sometimes he tells me... I mean there are times he starts to say it on his own, and he stops...
Thanks!!!!
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/30/2009 3:18:24 AM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
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BTW he doesn't live close to me, he lives several hours away, but I usually see him once or twice a month... It does seem that it is hard for him to say goodbye, but that could just be me.... I can make him laugh and he loves my personality and my spirit... He's told me that before... I do wish he would "talk" to me and tell me how he feels and where he wants us to go.. Maybe he will soon.. I sure pray that he does...
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/31/2009 5:16:51 AM
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rockominal
Posts: 664
Joined: 8/15/2007
From: Indiana
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I've actually thought of that without typing it. That he indeed has these feelings that are in a balloon ready to burst. Perhaps he has had this conflict going on for some time. That's a good thing. That means there is something there, to say the least! It could be that he's afraid of what others might think (I'm just making that up) or just afraid in general. If that happens, for whatever reason, a method of denial can be used to rationalize and subdue these thoughts and feelings. If such is the the case, then that's terrible isn't it? If he was already married, then we know how difficult it would be to deny and hide such feelings then [for you], and certainly not act on them. So I did think of that caveat that he does feel this way but has some sort of conflict. If you remove the pain you remove the beauty of it as well. If that is the case, I don't see how much more he can possibly endure.
That would be a whole lot better than feeling something like, "there's joyful! Haven't seen you for awhile and it's good to have a friend like you." Comfort is a good thing to have when you want a pillow. Why on earth would anyone want a safety net in this situation. You aren't a pillow.
There's a girl at work that smiles when she sees me too, depending on her mood, and gives me a hug sometimes. She simply knows that I won't try anything like I'm sure alot of guy have tried with her. That's all it is.
_____________________________
I might tell you the truth, or something pretty close to it. Jesus says, "I Am the Truth."
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/31/2009 6:45:32 AM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
Status: offline
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It could be that he is afraid of what people will say and think.. He has been engaged twice but they broke it off... One he dated all through high school and she broke it off just a short while before they were too get married...
IF he cares as much as you seem to think he does, how can he bear not to talk to me??? How can he help but be in touch with me?? NOW just before---he stopped all communication--he defended me and told someone off about me... That was the last major communication that we really had... I don't know--it is all very confusing and I miss him more than anything..... I just really, really, really hope you're right... No one knows how much so, but me and the LORD... IF anything happens I'll sure let ya know...
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RE: I Don't Understand - 10/31/2009 9:11:27 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
Status: offline
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I have gone back and read some of our important emails, and He doesn't come out and say, that we are "just Friends" he says, we are friends... There is a difference of terminology there... NOT JUST FRIENDS, but friends... One he thanked me for standing with him and that I was a precious friend and he hoped that I considered him the same... No where do I find where he tells me that he wants us to "JUST BE FRIENDS." Lord, the more I read and pray the more confused I get... WHY can't love be simple??? WHY can't it be like GOD intended it to be??? I just want to marry him and be his for the next 100 years... OK, whatever time we have left.. lol Of course I could be with him for 100 years, and still not have had enough time with him... I'll see him soon, maybe something will give then... ALSO, I'll see him on my birthday, and I sure wish he would take me out for a romantic dinner anywhere...
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RE: I Don't Understand - 11/1/2009 4:26:42 AM
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rockominal
Posts: 664
Joined: 8/15/2007
From: Indiana
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: 2joyful
IF he cares as much as you seem to think he does, how can he bear not to talk to me??? How can he help but be in touch with me?
If that is the case, there would have to be some MAJOR road block, because I know that I couldn't take it. Again, I'm just guessing at this quandary and/or if indeed he has this inner turmoil, so to speak.
quote:
ORIGINAL: 2joyful
I just really, really, really hope you're right... No one knows how much so, but me and the LORD... IF anything happens I'll sure let ya know...
I hope I'm right as well, and thanks for letting me know. Sometimes I go into a hiatus on this thing because I'm on flight simulator so much, but that mailbox thing on here works. As far as fear is concerned, any whirlwing relationship getting started is just that. All bets are off. The predictability and behavior factor gets ripped apart. It has to be that way. I rememebr my mother asked me when I was a teenager.. "when are you going to come out of your shell?"
It was a different issue then in my case, but pretty much the same thing. Time to go for broke. Yes, the Lord knows exactly what you're feeling. That's pretty incredible when I consider that.
_____________________________
I might tell you the truth, or something pretty close to it. Jesus says, "I Am the Truth."
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RE: I Don't Understand - 11/1/2009 4:34:12 AM
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rockominal
Posts: 664
Joined: 8/15/2007
From: Indiana
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: 2joyful
ALSO, I'll see him on my birthday, and I sure wish he would take me out for a romantic dinner anywhere...
Also take you to the store and go get you an outfit or something, and then go where there is some water, like a lake. They have this huge swamp lake here that doesn't look too bad at night. That's the coolest looking time, at night.
Bloomington Indiana has Lake Monroe, which would be cool. You could walk around there or some place like that. That movie called Amelia was pretty good to see, but I like flying so I'm partial to that. A pretty romantic movie about Amelia Earhart.
_____________________________
I might tell you the truth, or something pretty close to it. Jesus says, "I Am the Truth."
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RE: I Don't Understand - 11/3/2009 11:55:44 PM
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2joyful
Posts: 54
Status: offline
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I saw my "honey" this past weekend, but everyone and everything seemed to stop us from talking... We did talk by phone several times, but I wanted to talk to him in person and not over the phone to discuss this issue... He genuinely seemed glad to see me and seemed sorry to have to leave....Oh we were discussing something and he said he wasn't looking for anyone... So maybe that's my answer... Heck if I know... I've decided to just pray about it and ask GOD to give us the chance to talk, or for GOD to work on him wanting to "TALK' to me... I do feel better after seeing him this weekend... Though we didn't really get a chance to talk much---at least I got to spend a little time with him.... I'm grateful for that...
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