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RE: A life to cherish - 7/9/2009 11:35:01 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Today is the anniversary of my dad's death. I've been pretty weepy today.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/10/2009 11:01:41 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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For many years, my dad worked as a bartender.
Ever since I was young, I was told how much I looked like my dad. I lived in a city of 36000-37000 people. Not that big. I was also told, that if I ever got lost, anybody who knew my dad from where he worked would know where to take me because I looked so much like my dad.
It makes me wonder. When people look at us, do they know Who our Father is? I'm not meaning our biological dads, or our adoptive dads. When people see us, do we reflect our Heavenly Father? Do we reflect His qualities? Is it noticeable to others? I don't know about you, but I need to work more on becoming more like my Heavenly Father so that people can see that I belong to Him. I hope that when people see me, they see my Heavenly Father too.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/14/2009 10:57:31 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Today I said goodbye to 42 of the scarves that I made. A friend of mine who is a school chaplain came to see me, and I gave them to her. I haven't finished making them yet. I finished one after she left, and I have another 5 scarves to make before I finish with the school scarves. Originally my friend was going to use the for prizes or as a thankyou for community service. I really wasn't happy with the idea of it. I felt that they were meant to to go to people who are in need, need encouragement. My friend brought up about a group that she runs for students who are struggling with grief and loss. Some have domestic violence issues in their homes, some have lost people close to them. All sorts of things. I thought that was perfect. There's another school chaplain who works with kids in a lower socio-economic areas, and they would be good things for her to hand out too. We have another school chaplain from our church, but apparently, the parents are of a higher socio-economic group and are less likely to need the help. It still feels good to know that I'm doing somthing useful and practical to help others.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/14/2009 11:14:25 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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The other day, I talked to my usual doctor about me having rheumatoid arthritis. The tests came back negative, but he said that they don't show up correctly. I could still have it. I have to go back and see the rheumatologist.
In an attempt to help my hands, my doctor put me on a diuretic to see if that helps. One of the side effects is the lowering of blood pressure, and another is dizziness. I've already been having dizzy spells before all of this and now it's just worsened. Will have to keep an eye on things.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/20/2009 11:05:48 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Well, on Friday afternoon, I went to my favourite Christian bookstores and it all well. Here are some of the things that I said in my thread.
Well, going to my favourite Christian bookstore proved to be a shock. A good shock though. Around this time of the year, lots of my friends have birthdays etc. So I bought them some things from there for their birthdays. I'm also an avid reader, just in case you didn't know. I'm very particular about the types of books I like to read. No mysteries like I used to read as a youngster. No Frank Peretti. As much as I love his style of writing, I think it would be nightmare material for me at the moment. I've got a very vivid, active imagination. So, I real light novels, from a particular time period or setting.
Anyway, I went to put my books etc onto my account. I know that people don't like putting things on credit. It's the only place I do that, and I don't have a credit card. They give you 30 days to pay for your purchases, and I make sure that things get paid. Anyway, the customer service manager served me. He asked me if I always bought as much as I did. Um...yes. I wondered if I'd done something wrong. If I'd gone over my limit or something. So he proceeded to ask me if I was buying those things for myself, or for a shop/store. I told him it was for me. He checked back on my previous purchases and found that I usually did buy a lot of their stock. If you put it on account and paid for it straight away, and had spent a certain amount of money, you would get a voucher or 10% discount. I rarely had the money when I came in, so it mostly went on account for me to pay later. Anyway, he said to me that he thought it only fair that I get a discount on all that I buy. So from now on, I receive a 15% discount on everything that I buy there! I was so stunned that I could barely speak! I barely managed to squeak out 'thankyou!' When I told Joan when I got back to the car, she said I just walked out of the store with my mouth wide open in shock. She reckons that God is blessing me for the things that I'm doing for other people. I don't see it as a big deal, the things I'm doing. Knitting is something that I usually enjoy. I enjoy writing to my penpals, and I feel this year that I'm to concentrate on getting Christmas gifts to my penpals this year instead of on CWers like I have in recent years. Cards to CWers, definitely, but not so much of an incidence of gifts to CWers. It's just something that I feel God is wanting me to do this year. I'm fine with it. I just want to do what God wants me to do.
This is all going to be interesting.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/22/2009 1:08:46 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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After I posted the above post, the storm that we'd been having got a whole lot worse. Some people lost roofing, and had a lot of damage. Thankfully nothing was damaged as far as the house was concerned. There's a tree outside of my bedroom window. Thankfully, John pruned a lot of it last year. Anyway, during the storm, a large tree limb got ripped off the tree. Thankfully it also got pulled away from my window by the wind, otherwise there would have been a terrible mess and we would have needed emergency services to put up some tarp over the area. It's crashed all over the new garden that John's been working on before he goes for surgery on the 31st of July. The main thing is that we are all still safe, and there wasn't any damage to the house.
My city doesn't get snow, but during the storm, the closest thing we got was pea sized hail.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/28/2009 12:00:35 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Hey everybody. How are you doing? Thanks for going on this ride with me. I was going to post about another song that has been ministering to me, but I think I'll do that another time.
Our home is in a little bit of chaos right now. No, no arguments, domestic violence or anything like that. John finally has his shoulder surgery on Friday. Being the man that he is, he's trying to do all the things he's got written on his mental list before he goes into hospital. Cut up and get rid of the big branch that came down in the storm last week, fix the shower door, replace washers on toilets and taps (fawcets), prune plants, cut down the top of the orange tree, drill holes into the shed door, raking up the property, mow the lawns etc, etc, etc... I tell ya, by the time that man gets to the bed on Friday, he's going to need it! Not that he's been asked to do any of the things that he's been doing. That's just him for you. Seeing as he won't be able to do things for 3 months, he's trying to get it ALL done. He says that he's going to try and do things early, but he won't as long as Joan and I have anything to say about it. Everybody's been warning him how painful the surgery and aftermath are, so I daresay that that will stop him too.
When I've had surgery, John and Joan have looked after me. When Joan has had surgery, John and I have looked after her. When John has surgery, Joan and I look after him. It's just the way that we've always been.
In all honesty, I'm worried. I'm not worried about John's surgery. I'm sure that will be fine. I'm worried about when he comes home. (Not that I don't want him home). I think everybody knows that I have fibromyalgia. Not the most pleasant of conditions at the best of times. Most days it causes me more pain than I care to admit. I'm going to be doing everything I can to help Joan to care for John. The last time John had surgery, I had no clue that I had fibromyalgia. I just thought I was lazy and tired and being held back by my weight. I tried to help then, but didn't get very far. Lately I've been able to do even less.
With me being able to do less and less, John in a lot of ways has become like my unofficial carer. Helping me with shopping, meals, lifting things, helping with some of my personal business like doctor's appointments etc.
I feel as though I'm not going to be in good enough condition to be able to give him the help that he's going to need over the next 3 months that he's not supposed to be doing things.
The last time John was in hospital, I did as much as I could, but it wasn't long after John came home that she was in a flood of tears saying how exhausted she was in trying to care for him. I want to be there to help, but I just don't know how much help I'm actually going to be to him, or Joan for that matter. I just feel useless. 
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/30/2009 2:57:12 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Well, tomorrow is the big day for John's surgery. He was told yesterday at pre-op not to do any more pruning etc, as if he gets a cut or anything, his surgery could be cancelled.
I'm taking John and John out to dinner tonight just to give John a night off cooking. He likes to cook and organises dinner all the time. We have to get permission to cook dinner! Well, we won't for the next 3 months. I'm also trying to get John to relax. He's so stressed out.
Speaking of stressed out, I had a meltdown last night. I just couldn't stop crying. It was horrible! All I kept thinking was that I didn't look after my parents when they were sick, and now I won't be able to look after John. My parents, of course, were back in New Zealand. I really feel that I'm never meant to go back to New Zealand. I couldn't get back to New Zealand when my mother were dying. My brothers asked me to come back to look after dad after mum died and my dad had alzheimers. I couldn't go back as I'd just had major surgery. I couldn't lift a teapot, let alone my father, if he fell over.
As you can tell, the whole thing of helping look after John is really weighing on me.
John doesn't see the point in using a youth group to do anything in the yard. Not that our youth ministry helps that much for things like that. The top of the orange tree needs to be pruned, but he'd rather have somebody who knows what they're doing to do that, rather than a bunch of kids. I think he's letting that area of things go, and will just do something about it after he's able.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 7/31/2009 11:59:11 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Well, we're all home and all exhausted. We finally got a phone from the hospital nearly 6 hours after we left him to say that his surgery had been cancelled due to time constraints. The poor man had been waiting at the hospital for almost 6 hours before the staff decided that they had better do something about it.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/5/2009 6:20:57 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Today is the 2nd of August. It's also 19 years since I got water baptised. I remember it like it was yesterday.
I'm just watching the TV and there's a story on the news saying that an army barracks in Perth was going to be targeted by terrorists. It was found on the internet. Just yesterday, police found 5 men in Melbourne who were going to attack a military site in Sydney. It's scary to think that Australia is being targeted now. They had just said on last night's news for Western Australians not to become complacent about terrorists ever attacking our state.
John has his new date for the hospital. His surgery is now scheduled for the 18th of August. At least the things he wanted to have done last time are now done. Other than giving Bailey another bath and a few other things, John has all the things done that he wanted to get done. Hopefully everything will go well.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/8/2009 10:30:48 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Hey there. Just checking in. Nothing special going on.
It's been a quiet past few days. I've been experiencing a lot of pain due to the fibromyalgia. Usually the couch is somewhere comfortable to sit whilst I knit or whatever. I'm finding that my back can only take it so long now before I have to get up and move around. Sometimes I can get comfortable sitting up in bed. It's good because I can knit there or read, or whatever I want to do. It's just frustrating that I can't stay as comfortable as I once used to. Anyway, I didn't mean to whine.
For a while now, I've been tossing around the idea of growing vegetables in pots. My parents used to grow some of their own vegetables in the backyard when I was growing up. I never learned how. I thought it might be something interesting to try. I've opened up a thread about it in the home and garden folder if you've got any suggestions for me on what to grow and how. Once I can master veggies, (which I'm not intending to feed the entire family with), maybe I can move onto flowers. Just something different to try.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/10/2009 12:50:17 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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I seem to have started something. John, Joan and I are going to a garden nursery tomorrow to have a look at seedlings. We'll see what they have that will be easy enough for me to grow in boxes. I've decided on cherry tomatoes and carrots so far.
Part of our back garden is a raised garden. It's been full of bulbs for quite a few years. Daffodils, irises, hyacinths etc. This year, those bulbs have flowered, but all the other bulbs we've had in the ground haven't, despite multiplying quite a bit. So, John decided that he would make it into a veggie garden. He said something to me yesterday about putting the lawnmower through the garden, (there's also plenty of weeds in there), and turning he soil and letting it rot down. At that stage he hadn't told me about his plans for a veggie garden. Just that he was going to get rid of what there was of the garden, other than the flowers that had come up. So, I head out to the backyard this afternoon, and lo and behold, John had mowed the garden and had started turning all the soil over. Man, does it look different! This afternoon, we were talking about which vegetables to grow. We love corn, but to buy it in the supermarkets here is really expensive. So John will grow some corn in this new garden. No idea what else at this stage. There are some vegetables that he's grown before but won't be able to grow here. Where he'd had a veggie garden before, the climate was a lot cooler. It would be too hot here for them to grow. So it's going to be some trial and error. We're not planning on growing enough vegetables so that won't have to buy vegetables again. Just some fun. John loves gardening and I thought that it would be another way that we can bond. That, and it would be good knowledge to have. It will also be something that John can help me with whilst he's recovering from his shoulder surgery. He can do the talking, and I can do the work.
Oh, speaking of surgery, John's surgery has been moved again. This time to the 19th of August. A day later than before.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/12/2009 11:21:28 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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*Sigh*. It's coming up to 11pm, and I'm glad that the morning is over. Today, tomorrow and Friday are all days with medical appointments in them for me.
This morning I had to go to the hospital to get seen about the lap band that I had put in about 4-5 years ago. First, I got a shock at how much weight I've put on! I was told that insulin can cause weight gain. I'm not blaming the whole thing on insulin. I know that I have a part in all of this too. I haven't been exercising as much as I should have been, and that's because of my pain levels due to the fibromyalgia. I've been told that I need to be referred to a pain management place. The doctor told me that I should be on stronger pain relief for the next 8-12 months to get me over the pain thing and back to exercising. I know too that I've been eating too much. Feeling full after eating is something that I've never experienced. I'm just going to have to cut back on everything and too bad if I'm still hungry at the end of it.
The 'doctor' that I saw this morning wanted to add more saline to my gastric band. All I can say is that I don't ever want to go through that again, but I can see that I'm not going to get much of a choice. The doctor that I had last time was really good. He understood where I was coming from. The impact of all the other health problems that I have, and there are many. The 'doctor' this morning couldn't find the port and spent ages digging around in my abdomen trying to find it. He first started at the bottom of my stomach. I had to tell him he was looking in the wrong place and where he should look. Once he started looking, he couldn't find it. So, with a long syringe, he started trying to find it in order to check the amount of fluid was in there. Meanwhile, I'm trying not to scream in pain. I don't know what he was doing, but he was walking around the consulting room whilst I still had this huge needle sticking out from just below my rib cage. When it was obvious he couldn't find the port, I suggested that he get a second opinion. He eventually did. This 'doctor' I saw about a year ago. The day after I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I'd told him then that my stress levels were too high, and I told him why, and he agreed not to put any fluid in the band. He saw me this morning and said, "Oh, I remember you. I saw you last year after getting diagnosed with fibromyalgia or something and you didn't want anymore fluid in your band". He started prodding at me, and honestly, by now I'd had enough. I was so sore. The second 'doctor' told him to add even more saline as this wouldn't be enough to get me losing weight. By the time I got up, I was feeling dizzy. I walked back into the other part of the room where the doctor talks to the patients, still feeling light headed. I walked out, holding my ribs as they were so sore. I'm supposed to get more saline in the port in 3 months. They were pushing so hard around my rib cage and diaphragm that I felt like I couldn't breathe, get my lungs full. It was horrible!
John didn't go into the area where I was examined, but he was in the other part of the room. I take him because there's always something that I forget to tell the doctors. And he remembers things that I don't. When I was telling him what was going on in the room, some of which he heard, I was shocked when he asked me if I want to make a complaint about what happened. In all honesty, I have a thing about authority, and feel as though it will be seen as his word against mine. John did hear me tell him where the port was when he was looking in the wrong place. John heard me ask about a second opinion. He asked me about some of the events in the room and I told him. Joan thinks that I should say something in case others have had the same problem. I just feel like I'd be causing trouble and be seen as somebody less than the doctor. All I know is that I don't ever want to experience that ever again. I haven't said everything that happened there, but I just know I don't want that to happen again.
Afterwards, I went to get some groceries to take down to church to go into food hampers. School chaplains take them to needy families, and needy people from the community come to get food for themselves and their families too. Whilst I was there, I saw one of the women from church. She asked how I was as she stood in the next queue at the checkouts. I sighed and said it had been a long day, and I'd been at the hospital that morning. We were sitting outside trying to get ourselves organised when she came running out of the store with 3 tulips. She's Dutch, so it meant something to her. It was so sweet and unexpected.
At least the day ended better than it started.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/15/2009 9:52:36 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Last night, our household was pretty upset. Still is. One of the friends that came over for my 40th birthday from Wales has had some bad news healthwise. He has cancer in his liver, lung and possibly his brain. He isn't a believer. At the time, he doesn't mind that we are praying for him. All prayers of he, his family and friends would be wonderful. Thanks.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/18/2009 11:57:43 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Time to give this another try. John is booked in for surgery again tomorrow. We'll wait and see whether or not he actually has the surgery. He has a small scratch on his finger, so they may decide not to operate on him for that reason. Apparently doctors have sent patients home for that reason. I guess it's the whole infection thing. So, we shall wait and see. Last time we hung around a shopping centre close by the hospital just in case they didn't operate. (It happened to Joan once before). Around 5 hours later, as we were just about to enter the front door, they called us to say that he didn't have surgery and could we please come and pick him up. This time Joan wants to stay up there longer just in case he's not having surgery. John will tell them straight up so they can decide about the surgery or not.
If they choose not to do the surgery due to the cut, then I'll understand about that, but we won't be happy. The hospital keeps making appointments and then changing them, even when he doesn't have any cuts etc. We have to keep rearranging our medical appointments to suit, only for them to move things again. I've been trying to see the rheumatologist since July, and due to all the changes in hospital appointments, I can't get in to see her now until the 17th of September. I'm getting really frustrated, as I really need to see her about the pain and swelling in my hands, and the hospital clinic I went to last week also told me that I have to talk to her about pain management. Fibromyalgia has worsened in me, and it doesn't help that my appointments keep getting pushed back. Normally John comes with me. After his surgery, Joan will be able to come with me. It's just that on the days that he has appointments, she understandably wants to be with him. I don't think that's selfish in the least. We've just had some things happen that make things difficult. We'll get there.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/19/2009 9:16:09 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Well, the deed is done. Joan and I waited around the nearest shopping centre/mall to the hospital for a few hours before calling to see if his surgery was happening. He was just being wheeled into the holding room where they go before the operating theatre. We spoke to him last night and he was groggy and full of painkillers. This morning, he's waiting for the physiotherapist and the occupational therapist. They'll work on him, and if they can do that and he can be pain free with the use of oral medication, then they'll let him home. I was just on the phone with him and had to quickly get off the phone as he said, "he's got more people coming for him". Makes it sound as though he's being mobbed up there. LOL! Just as long as they take good care of him up there. One of the nurses loosen his sling, and he said that apparently it's the first time in years that he hasn't been in pain there. I think that's wonderful. Let's see if we can keep it that way.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/20/2009 12:26:12 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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More excitement for me. John and I took a look this afternoon at the plants that I put into the ground on Sunday afternoon. The tomato plants both have their first flowers on them! Woohoo! There's some unopened buds there as well. Learning to grow vegetables is fun!
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/29/2009 1:25:46 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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John is doing well. He's getting a good range of movement when he does the exercises the hospital gave him to do. He sees the surgeon again next week. Joan and I expected that he would just be sitting around after the surgery, but we've been wrong. John's been really bored, so he gets up and does the things that he can. Thankfully the things that he can't, he leaves to us. I think part of the thing is that he needs to feel that we still need him. That we certainly do.
Most nights, John, Joan and I have a game of some kind. Scrabble, Rummikub, Skipbo, Canasta, Squatter, (a farming version of Monopoly), or something. If Joan doesn't join us, then John and I usually alternate between Skipbo, (John's favourite) and Rummikub, (my favourite).
Anyway, one night, about a month ago, John and I were having a game, and listening to a CD. It had the song Butterfly Kisses on it by Bob Carlisle. For those of you who don't know it, it's about a father watching his little girl growing up, and ending on her wedding day. The daughter, on her wedding day, tells her father that she's ready and asks her father to walk her down the aisle and give her away. John was listening to that song. I asked him what he was thinking. He said that he was thinking that he might never get to walk me down the aisle. I asked him why, and he said, "Because of all the reasons you said". When I think of me getting married some day, I think of how I will probably never end up getting married. Why? Because of all the health issues that I have. I suffer from depression and now, fibromyalgia. I don't know of any man who would want to take on the responsibility of caring for a partner with pre-existing health problems. I mean, where the woman has health problems BEFORE they get married. It means that I wouldn't be able to take care of him and the home as well as they should be taken care of. I've also been on so many government benefits over the years for study, unemployment, disability etc and don't have much in the way of actual work experience. In New Zealand, I lived in the place where there was the highest amount of unemployment in the country. So I moved, thinking that I might have a better chance. That didn't work. I spent a lot of time unemployed, then went back to get more education. When I got to Australia, I did some part time work and casual work. Schools told me that the education I did was only equal to their grade 8. I wasn't impressed, so in one year, did grade 8-11, then did grade 12. Then went on to further studies. It wasn't until I just about got to the end of my degree that I found that God didn't want me to finish it. The following year, I started another course and my health issues caused me to go onto disability pension.
So, I feel like my health would be a reason that would turn men off. I don't feel that I am attractive enough. My work situation, or lack thereof, could turn men off. I couldn't contribute to the household finances, bringing in money. There's other reasons too, but that day when John said that he might never get the chance to walk me down the aisle because of the reasons that I'd given him, it really stunned me, and made me realise that I'm not the only one thinking along those lines. I'm a 40 year old woman, with very little experience in anything. I know John and Joan would love to see me happily married some day, but obviously there's part of them that doesn't think it will happen either. I know that being married is not the be all and end all. It is something that I think about and wonder if I could truly be happy, and have a spouse who is happy with me too, in a loving, fulfilling marriage. I ask God sometimes if I'll ever be married. I'm still waiting on the answer. I guess only time will tell.
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From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/29/2009 1:43:24 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Before I forget, John has asked me to tell all of those who have been praying for him, thankyou. He really appreciates all prayers that have gone up on his behalf.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/4/2009 1:49:11 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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John had his 2 week appointment with his specialist yesterday. He is extremely pleased at John's progress. He had John doing different things with his arm. Before John got the chance to show him all that he could do, the specialist would stop him and just say, "Excellent". He doesn't need to see the specialist again now for another 4 weeks. Then the physical terrorism (physiotherapy) will start. Thanks again for all of your prayers.
The 4th of September, and we've finally got blue skies. It's really cold inside the house, so I'll go and spend some time outside soon.
Where has the year gone? We're already into September! Is it just me, or does the year just disappear? Already thinking of Christmas things, but only because I have things to get into the mail for overseas countries. For friends and family here in Australia, I haven't even started to think. There's still plenty of time for that.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/6/2009 12:18:33 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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No great news to pass on, other that to say that my other tomato plant is now growing my second tomato. WOOHOO!!
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/8/2009 11:11:19 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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No new news on the garden. Everything's growing as it should be. A creepy crawly has been eating some of the plant, so John put some bait down to try and stop any further feasts.
One of Bailey's eyes has been pink for a few days, so last night we decided that he needed to be seen by the vet. He came with this dye all over the eye area, making the problem area looking a strange green colour. I thought it was an eye infection, but I got it wrong. Somehow he's managed to scratch his cornea. So, he has ointment to try and improve it, and we go back to see the vet on Friday to check on its progress. Hopefully Bailey won't be trying to swat at his eye so much. I hope he just gets better quickly.
< Message edited by cherish405 -- 9/8/2009 11:19:45 AM >
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/9/2009 12:33:40 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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We're needing to put some thing onto the tomato plants. Slugs are getting to them and starting to eat them. One of the leaves that John had noticed had been eaten, has started growing again. The tomato plant has a lot of flowers on it right now, and lots of buds. Hopefully there'll be lots of tomatoes come from the plants.
Silverbeet is growing well. The 3 plants that were put in the garden are growing well. We had to put them there as we'd run out of space in the boxes. They're the best out of all of them. We've lost some of the carrot plants too. I suspect that the slugs have been getting into them too. John has put some bait on the ground to try and kill them so they won't eat the plants. I hope it works. Still have to get some tomato dust to try and keep nasties off the plants.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/10/2009 11:29:08 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32132
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: online
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Just when I thought I was just about done with the scarves, I found a couple more to do. I've started them, (ages ago), but at least one of them needs to be taken apart and reknitted as the needles are too small. It will take me AGES to get those finished! The one that I was knitting, hoping it would be the last, is on very small needles. I hadn't taken it apart to put on bigger needles. In retrospect, it would have been better, but it's too late now. I'm onto the second half of it now. I'm not going to take it apart now to redo it.
We've had quite a bit of rain in the last couple of days. It's supposed to last for days. Our water catchment sure could use the water. Our dams are not as full as we had hoped.
_____________________________
From this time forth, with the powers vested in me, this post serves as public notice of the issuance of one unrevocable lisence to cherish405 to have special dispensation in the matter of drive-by huggings as she sees fit. ~rayofson~
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