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deermousie -> RE: Advice on telling someone something they don't want to hear (9/27/2008 11:42:05 PM)
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Hi, RubySparkles! I haven't seen you for awhile; nice to see you here again. [sm=wave.gif]
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the central theme was 'give us your money, all of it so that it really damages your finances, and you'll have a breakthrough of equal impact'.
This sends up a red flag to me, too. It sounds like it's saying you can twist God's arm. No, we can't, but we can trust His promises, like He'll add everything to us as we seek His Kingdom first. That might not include money; it's His choice. What you're describing sounds like the "name it and claim it theology" that has come under fire. I found this:
http://www.rapidnet.com/~jbeard/bdm/Psychology/posit.htm (their statement of faith - I read the main points - sounds right on); it might help you understand what you might be dealing with. Do a word search on "positive confession." The more you know, the more you can balance; God's Word is supreme and inerrant; everything else needs close examination. Test for truth.
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Tomorrow I have to wear white to the service, because dressing the same on 'special' days also apparently makes a difference.
I don't know of any biblical precedent for this; maybe it's there and I haven't discovered it yet. Could it be a church tradition for the sake of the sense of togetherness? Nothing wrong with that as long as it's understood it's not biblical but something that's nice to do as a church family.
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I have stopped reading my bible and find praying quite difficult.
This could be key: do you have any unconfessed sin in your life? The old saying is a good one: the Bible will keep you away from sin and sin will keep you away from the Bible.
I find I can trip up so easy (I hate being a sinner) and not even realize it until it's been a while or my husband points it out (never a happy occasion, which practically proves he's right). I have to confess (I sinned), repent (I am turning away from it and doing differently) and thank God that He forgave it 2000 years ago and our relationship is now restored (thank You!).
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I cannot find any motivation and I just think 'ok I'm a christian (I got baptised last weekend)...
Whoo-woo! Congratulations on getting baptized! It's a big deal!
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...and there is God, but so what?' God will not necessarily do anything for me whether I read/pray or not so I'll just wait and see if anything happens. I've tried doing things for him, like trying to run a Sunday School, which failed because of lack of support. However, I'll still bless my food and I think I asked the other day for healing for my mother.
Even when life is boring and dull, we can rejoice that our names are in the Lamb's Book of Life. When we stand before God a second after we die, it's the ONLY thing that is important! Remember getting in trouble as a kid and then getting let off the hook, the relief you felt. It's a small version of how you'll feel when Jesus puts His arm around your shoulder and says, "Rubysparkles believed on Me" and the Righeous Judge says, "Well done, good and faithful servant; enter into the joy of My Kingdom." Whoo-woo! You'll be doing backflips of joy. So why not start now? [:)]
Look in Revelation, what the angels say in worship of God. It's eye-opening! (Or listen to Handel's Messiah - it's all Scripture, put to music, and maybe some of the finest music ever written in the world).
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Which brings me on to the problem.
I live with my mother. She will not be happy when I say I want to go elsewhere. I think it's a combination of her wanting to control me and also not wanting to go to church by herself. I feel guilty (only female child of a single mother syndrome) but I don't want to be responsible for my mother's happiness.
OK, your mother sacrificed everything probably to raise you. That's what we parents are supposed to do. And then, after growing old in our service to our kids, we're supposed to let them go. Lousy deal for us parents [:D], but it's how God makes adults to fly. Your mom is having trouble with losing you; understandable. If you were leaving to marry, she'd probably be OK with that, but this doesn't seem like a separation point, and she loves you. She may be using you to be her company when ideally moms have husbands to keep from getting lonely and she doesn't. That's hard, and widows have the same problem. It's not ideal but can be dealt with.
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I need help with how to say something I need to say but I'm afraid. The last time I so dramatically went against what my mother wanted was when I went to live in a different country for 2.5 years. Greatest thing I ever did.
I like Agapetos' suggestion of finding a new church and taking her with you. That's hard because the old church is familar and she's probably got friends there. Why not sit down with her, ask her to just listen, and pour out your heart and suggest you find a new church and take her to see if she'd like it there, too. Going somewhere new with you might be better than going alone to the old church.
This doesn't seem like much advice; sorry I haven't more to give. I hope things will go better, and I am praying for you and her tonight. God bless you, dear sister in the Lord. (((Hugs)))
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