What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (Full Version)

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Memaw. -> What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/14/2008 2:38:05 PM)

We learn from our parents (or whoever raised us) how to be a husband or a wife.

Good or bad, what did you learn from yours?




Oldwing -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/14/2008 7:16:34 PM)

From my father I learned it was OK to have a wandering eye. From my mother I learned that a wandering eye will get you a divorce. My mother's wisdom won out.




nevaehs_gaze -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/14/2008 9:32:10 PM)

I've learned that not communicating your feelings and desires to each other is horrible for a marriage. I've learned that escapism is not the answer to problems at home. I've learned that divorce is not an option... but I've also learned that misery is no way to live. I've learned that martial counseling does not help unless both people are willing make sacrifices and change. I've learned that it's very important to try to make things work even if you don't want them to. I've learned that enjoyment can come from trying, and regular dates are always healthy for a marriage.




BlessedMamaofmany -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/14/2008 10:31:54 PM)

Short version --- my parents taught me how to make a marriage fail. Hard to learn, good lessons though. Mistakes that will NOT be made in my marriage to be sure.




Christian30 -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/14/2008 11:56:33 PM)

My father told me nothing about being a good husband and a man putting his wife before himself. However, he SHOWED me how to do that endlessly. One example stands out.

Dad had lung cancer and was hospitalized periodically. My mother hated to drive, and with her advancing age she was uncomfortable driving to the hospital to be with Dad in another town, but she would still do so. One cold night in February 1992 she reluctantly left the hospital to drive home, and walked out to her car. Dad had not been out of bed for 2 days except to go to the bathroom, and sometimes not even for that reason. She was parked close to the patient rooms that particular day, and when she reached her car she looked up at his window and was stunned. He was actually standing at the window with his IV stand looking down at her. He was "watching out" for her even though he could do nothing physically even if she had a problem (beyond making a phone call). What touched my Mom was his attitude, she told me, because physically he was almost helpless. I thought about that a great deal over the years. I knew that my "manhood" or role as a husband could not be tied up in how much I could bench press, how much money I earned, or anything material or physical. The "root" of those roles was all inside of a man.




nevaehs_gaze -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/15/2008 4:41:26 AM)

That's wonderful, Christian!




3cappuccinosmom -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/15/2008 6:44:17 AM)

quote:

Good or bad, what did you learn from yours?


From my father--I learned how a good man behaves, loving, respecting, honoring, caring for his woman no matter what. [:D]

From my mother--I learned through her openness about her struggles what I *don't* want to be as a wife. I'm grateful that she was open and that she acknowledged her mistakes and told me how to avoid them. I also learned from her a lot about sacrifically caring for one's family, and she taught me many of the very useful practical things about homemaking that I know, and for that I am super grateful!




Szaftoo -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/15/2008 9:38:05 AM)

My parents taught me how to keep God in the relationship and how to really love each other. They also taught me to set aside time often with just the two of us and no distractions.




pbaribeault -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/15/2008 5:52:09 PM)

I learned that marriage is kind of an everyday thing -- that just being friendly and doing what it takes to get along is a big part of staying married.




3tulips -> RE: What I Learned, I Learned From My Parents (9/15/2008 6:50:09 PM)

Go behind closed doors to have a "discussion" (i.e. no fighting in front of the kids).




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