Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Life] >> Finances



Message

JJB1222 -> Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/11/2008 5:17:26 PM)

[:@]
I've been divorced for about 9 years but foolishly never closed the joint account we once shared. I feel so stupid for assuming he wasn't using it either. Turns out he was and recently let it get overdrawn. He never bothered to pay the balance owed and it was turned over to collections. I had no idea this was going on because all the mail was going to an address I haven't live at for about 10 years. All of the sudden it showed up on my credit report the other day. I contacted the collection company and told them I had no way of knowing and they offered me a settlement. I told them I would only pay it if they deleted it from my credit report. They are sending me a letter to confirm our discussion, but it still bothers me that I have to pay for his irresponsible behavior.

Has anyone else ever dealt with something like this?[:@]



relady -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/12/2008 12:16:25 AM)

Wow, I don't think I would have paid it. I would have disputed it, but that's just me. Close that account. Now.

Have you been using the account? I'm surprised the bank didn't close it out unless you've continued to use it.



conrack50 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/12/2008 7:50:29 AM)

In my opinion, you should contact each person you pay a bill to and let them know
you are the only one to be on the account. This includes banks,credit unions,credit cards,anyone you pay something to.
I paid for a costly mistake like yours for 10 long years.Made me angry every time I had to make a payment for something my ex did. I learned after that.
Just be careful in the future.
Connie Lou



DayStar43 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/12/2008 11:44:54 AM)

When there is a separation and divorce, every credit account should be closed so that no further transactions can be added. You can close down accounts with balances. As long as there is a balance, each spouse is responsible. No matter what debts the judge gives to a spouse, both are still liable. Credit is a contract and a divorce does not negate liability for all parties involved. Unfortunately, ex-spouses may continue to use your social security number to obtain credit. Lenders are not always honest in making sure that the signature is legit.



BlueAdept -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/12/2008 12:09:39 PM)

Since your divorce was so long ago, you are likely not responsible for any of that bill. Prior to paying it, unless it is a very small amount, I would contact your attorny and have them contact your ex.

If you pay this bill, what will prevent him from repeating it?

I think you could dispute it, and also work to get your name off the account.



sisrev -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/12/2008 12:10:26 PM)

I'm afraid that because this is a legitimately joint account, even though you haven't been the user for all these years, you are still liable. You might try contacting the bank directly to see if their is any kind of loophole, but generally when you open a joint bank account, both of you are equally liable, even if the other person is the one who wrote the bad checks.

I would for sure write a letter to the bank, making sure that you officially close the account, so that once this is paid off, he can't continue to use the account and do the same thing. I'd also go back and find any records you have of any other joint accounts you may have had and be sure that they are all closed.



JJB1222 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/15/2008 6:50:10 PM)

Yeah, unfortunately I just didn't take it upon myself to close it. I guess at the time I knew he was in denial of the whole separation/divorce thing (it happened by default because he wouldn't sign the papers). So I knew asking him to close the account would have put him over the edge and to my knowledge...don't you have to have the permission of both parties to close a joint account?

Well, I'm definitely going to have the attorney go after him. I'm not claiming responsibility for it, I just want it OFF my credit report.

I hope others can learn from my misfortune. If you are in the dismal end of a marriage...close all financial ties.

[:(]

Thanks for all your input.



Focusing -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/15/2008 7:25:31 PM)

quote:

don't you have to have the permission of both parties to close a joint account?

No. I closed out our joint bank accounts without his involvement, based on my attorney's advice. Unfortunately, in my case, he also overdrew the account ... and I had to settle the account when I closed it out.



Jenny-Fair -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/15/2008 8:36:23 PM)

Do NOT close a joint account if you plan to file your taxes as one. In order to get a refund direct deposited, you have to have an account in both your names.

My ex-husband left in December, and so we did file together. I had to leave the account open and hope he didn't realize the power he held until after the refund was deposited, and then close the account out. You can NOT remove one person from the account without the permission of both, however.



sisrev -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/15/2008 8:49:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair

Do NOT close a joint account if you plan to file your taxes as one. In order to get a refund direct deposited, you have to have an account in both your names.

My ex-husband left in December, and so we did file together. I had to leave the account open and hope he didn't realize the power he held until after the refund was deposited, and then close the account out. You can NOT remove one person from the account without the permission of both, however.


She's been divorced for 9 years--no tax issues there.

Also--you cannot remove one person from an account, but either person can close the account without the other.



Jenny-Fair -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/15/2008 9:03:12 PM)

I know my advice doesn't apply to the OP, but people read these threads later on for help in their own situations.



Bagel -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/15/2008 9:19:12 PM)

can't you remove yourself though from a joint account? I used to be a joint signer on my step-father's account and then later I was able to remove myself from that account without him having to sign anything.



JJB1222 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/16/2008 4:47:21 PM)

Yes - thankfully, no tax issues - at least none that I'm aware of. You never know when the IRS will come knocking...

Here's another tip - if you have a car loan together and you end up with the car - have the other spouse's name removed or re-finance the loan.

Several years after my divorce I sold "my" car, which he happened to be on the loan. I could not sign over the title because his name was on it. I had to call him up and beg him to take care of his part (signing off the title) so that the new buyer could have it. He, of course, thought he should get half of the sale price. [8|] It's just best to cut off all ties ASAP.



Mrs.Wifey -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/16/2008 5:44:09 PM)

You definitely have to get everything in writing, don't pay a dime until you do. Also, even though you have already "agreed" to pay you can still(and definitely should) request verification of the debt. If it's already with collections they may not be able to provide adequate proof that the debt is "yours" and it would then need to be removed from your credit report without you having to pay anything.



NotDoneYet -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/16/2008 7:17:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jenny-Fair

Do NOT close a joint account if you plan to file your taxes as one. In order to get a refund direct deposited, you have to have an account in both your names.

My ex-husband left in December, and so we did file together. I had to leave the account open and hope he didn't realize the power he held until after the refund was deposited, and then close the account out. You can NOT remove one person from the account without the permission of both, however.


Jenny, I don't think this is a true statement...
We have our refund direct-deposited every year and we have no joint accounts. It goes into my account and then we split it. We've never had any problems with that, either state or federal refunds. Check with the IRS tho.
(the reason we have no joint accounts is a very long story, painful lessons learned from x-spouses)...

NDY



Jenny-Fair -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/16/2008 7:24:20 PM)

It is possible their rules have changed in the 12 years since I have been divorced, but when I filed my taxes, the regulations stated that the account had to be in both our names.



MrsTracy72 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/18/2008 1:07:05 AM)

I do come from a collections background and I would definately not pay them until they send you a letter stating the terms. And also make sure that you do take your name off of the account and any other accounts that you might have forgotten about. If your name is still on the account, you still owe the money. At least from a legal standpoint, but you can take him to court and sue him for that money and your attorney and court costs since he did that and you paid for it. That all depends on how far you want to take it. But make sure that you get a letter before you pay of the terms, then make sure that you get a letter after you pay that the reference on your credit has been DELETED, not updated to be Paid in Full. There is a difference between the two.



JJB1222 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/27/2008 5:30:08 PM)

Thanks so much for all your input. I haven't been on in awhile (busy homeschooling). Here's an update:

I have YET to see any letter from this collection agency outlining our conversation. I noticed that they looked at my credit report just his last Friday, though. [:@]

Also...after a very long drawn out process of trying to re-finance our home (due to credit issues), our loan office recommended the following company Eukopia to help us fix credit issues. The good news...they are really good at what they do and understand the credit laws. The bad news... it is kind of pricey; $200 to set-up and $139/month for a couple (cheaper for individuals). However, you only have to use the service for the time you see fit (not a contract), so once your credit score has improve to where you want it, you can just stop. They also guarantee their service.

Being that good credit is essential to our business, this is just the price we have to pay.



Ps103 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/29/2008 12:51:58 PM)

Jamie, I went to that website, and it did not sound very professional to me.

I wouldn't pay them for anything.

Call CCCS in Atlanta, or another reputable company.



Lynn_J -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (9/30/2008 6:33:00 PM)

I'm surprised that your attorney did not include division of the funds and/or closing the bank account in the divorce settlement or decree. Usually such things are included in the property settlement. Was that not the case here?

Lynn



JJB1222 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (10/1/2008 6:31:38 PM)

Maybe it was...it's been so long...and there wasn't much to fight over like a house or investments or anything. And I don't think he even read the divorce papers. It happened by default (in other words...after no response from him for 90 days after filing, the divorce just went through).



Lynn_J -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (10/1/2008 7:19:39 PM)

The reason I asked is that even if it went through by default, there was some sort of decree or order signed by the judge. You may want to pull out your copy to see if any reference is in there about bank accounts. I was a divorce paralegal several years ago, and while I cannot give legal advice because I am not an attorney, I have seen in some cases (depending upon the state laws) that a copy of the divorce decree can help with the cancellation of a debt. Just something to ask your attorney about.

I pray that this gets resolved for you soon. Hang in there.



Ps103 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (10/1/2008 9:07:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynn_J

The reason I asked is that even if it went through by default, there was some sort of decree or order signed by the judge. You may want to pull out your copy to see if any reference is in there about bank accounts. I was a divorce paralegal several years ago, and while I cannot give legal advice because I am not an attorney, I have seen in some cases (depending upon the state laws) that a copy of the divorce decree can help with the cancellation of a debt. Just something to ask your attorney about.

I pray that this gets resolved for you soon. Hang in there.


Courts usually do divide things that way, Lynn, but the creditors are not bound to honor them. The judge's orders apply only to the two parties in the divorce--no one else.

I have seen some creditor's go with the decree, but many more ignore them...because they can, and they only want their money.



Lynn_J -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (10/1/2008 11:18:21 PM)

You are correct. It just happened to work that way for me on one of my debts. The creditor accepted a certified copy of the decree and then removed my name from the account.



JJB1222 -> RE: Ex-husband is hurting my credit! (10/3/2008 8:17:37 PM)

I suppose it's worth a try right?



Page: [1] 2   next >   >>



Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition 2.5 ANSI