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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 12:08:53 PM
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HisCovenant
Posts: 4288
Joined: 4/12/2005
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What is it you are studying Ryanne?
Did you get that picture Rachel? Isabel sounds like she's putting on quite a show!
I'm sorry, Chelsea!! I agree that getting out will do you a world of good. Why don't you and Mary find something to do that dh wouldn't enjoy? I've gotton into a habit of doing that whenever dh is gone. It's helped me to go from dreading him being gone to enjoying it. It's not that I look forward to having him gone, but I think of the positives instead of the negatives a bit more.
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-HisCovenant/ Zipporah
My friends call me Zippy!
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 1:55:32 PM
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Nicole_Michelle
Posts: 2667
Joined: 8/22/2007
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When I can't keep up with this thread I just start reading the most recent page and go from there. If someone I know really wants to let me know something they will just email me so I don't worry too much if I fall behind.
Our vacuum cleaner died on sunday and I may have found a newer one for $50 or less! It is only a year old and is $200 normally. I just emailed the lady back asking if we could get it for $40 and if we could pick it up tonight. I let her know that we would pick it up tonight for sure since we desperately need to vacuum our rugs. I hope she agrees to the $40 and doesn't sell it to anyone else.
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~Nicole~
For the love of photography - my blog
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 2:08:19 PM
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spitzu
Posts: 1088
Joined: 4/19/2005
Status: online
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Sandy - now we wait for the home study lady to write the home study and get it approved, which will take a few weeks. It has to be approved by several different people in the organization and is a very long document so it can take a while. We have to make our profile, which is the scrapbook-type thing, and once those two things are completed, we're put in the "pool" of parents. When birth parents make an adoption plan, they tell the agency what they want in adoptive parents and the agency goes to the pool and picks out all the candidates that are a match and shows them to the birth parents to pick (this happens usually about a month or so before the due date). If the birth parents don't want to pick (which happens quite often in some closed adoptions) then the agency picks the best match.
Sometimes they get hospital referrals, which is when someone does not have prior contact with the agency and gives birth and while at the hospital decides they want to place the baby for adoption, so the hospital calls the agency. In these cases, the agency usually chooses the parents because the birth parents just want out.
One thing I'd like to point out is once a child is placed with us, it will be ours. The birth parents *cannot* change their minds once their rights are terminated. The birth mom can't terminate her rights until 48 hours after birth, but once the document is signed, it's over and she absolutely 100% cannot take it back. The birth father can terminate his at anytime, but again, once it's done it's done.
The only people who could take away our child after placement would be the court, and that would only happen if there was abuse and/or neglect, which isn't an issue.  6 months after the baby is placed with us, we finalize the adoption in court. The first six months, the child is legally under our guardianship and we are his or her parents and have full responsibility over it, but at that court date it's 100% final and irreversible. The birth certificate is changed and a new social security card is issued and everything. I wanted to mention that because I've read some false information regarding domestic adoptions, even on here. Unfortunately everyone has heard a horror story, but that just does not happen here if everything is done properly through a reputable agency. Before the child is placed with us (and rights have been terminated) the birth parents call pull out. Definitely. But once it's in our home and ours, it's ours forever. 
Did I answer your question?    Sorry about the novel. You're all now experts on the domestic VIP through LSS. 
_____________________________
<- Ahh, the sound of a real shutter. It's like music!
Buggy Again
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 2:18:42 PM
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spitzu
Posts: 1088
Joined: 4/19/2005
Status: online
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(((Chelsea))) I remember dreading the days when hubby went out of town for work. I still don't enjoy it, but I keep myself busy and don't mind it as much anymore.
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<- Ahh, the sound of a real shutter. It's like music!
Buggy Again
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 2:32:48 PM
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zmanfan38
Posts: 8514
Joined: 9/14/2006
From: ...for it's root, root, root for the CUBBIES!!!
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: spitzu
That's good news Christi, on both fronts. Congrats on the job. I hope you continue to feel peace about it if it's the right move for you.
I do feel peace about it, but honestly it's just that we don't have any choice any more. I'd stay home with her forever if I could.
I just keep remembering how very, incredibly blessed I have been to stay home with my daughter for two and a half years. There are so many moms who would give anything to get to do that and never get to. Thank you, Lord!
I read that your visit is over with...yay! What do you have left to do now? Oh, nevermind, I kept reading and found your most recent post answering that question.
quote:
ORIGINAL: BlessedMamaofmany
Christi, what kind of job? You probably said, but I'm lazy
Sandy
You know, I don't remember if I ever said. You're not lazy...I'm goofy. My degree is in Medical Technology, and my title is Medical Laboratory Technician (I do blood tests). Sounds gross, but it's way cool. We run analyzers and do lots of manual type tests as well and do lots of microscope work and stuff like that.
Thanks to everybody for the hugs, well wishes and congrats!!!
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«Christi»
tattoo
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 2:33:33 PM
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Mrs.X
Posts: 2954
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: Newberg, OR
Status: offline
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OK, Maggie....I emptied some.
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-Stina
From Sweet Grass to the Packin' House
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. -Proverbs 15:1
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 2:39:36 PM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 5082
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
Status: offline
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quote:
What is it you are studying Ryanne?
My end goal is to be a Neonatal Nurse Practitioner, but right now I am just working on getting my RN so I can continue my education.
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 3:18:22 PM
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BlessedMamaofmany
Posts: 2026
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Just north of nowhere
Status: online
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quote:
ORIGINAL: spitzu
Sandy - now we wait for the home study lady to write the home study and get it approved, which will take a few weeks. It has to be approved by several different people in the organization and is a very long document so it can take a while. We have to make our profile, which is the scrapbook-type thing, and once those two things are completed, we're put in the "pool" of parents. When birth parents make an adoption plan, they tell the agency what they want in adoptive parents and the agency goes to the pool and picks out all the candidates that are a match and shows them to the birth parents to pick (this happens usually about a month or so before the due date). If the birth parents don't want to pick (which happens quite often in some closed adoptions) then the agency picks the best match.
Sometimes they get hospital referrals, which is when someone does not have prior contact with the agency and gives birth and while at the hospital decides they want to place the baby for adoption, so the hospital calls the agency. In these cases, the agency usually chooses the parents because the birth parents just want out.
One thing I'd like to point out is once a child is placed with us, it will be ours. The birth parents *cannot* change their minds once their rights are terminated. The birth mom can't terminate her rights until 48 hours after birth, but once the document is signed, it's over and she absolutely 100% cannot take it back. The birth father can terminate his at anytime, but again, once it's done it's done.
The only people who could take away our child after placement would be the court, and that would only happen if there was abuse and/or neglect, which isn't an issue. 6 months after the baby is placed with us, we finalize the adoption in court. The first six months, the child is legally under our guardianship and we are his or her parents and have full responsibility over it, but at that court date it's 100% final and irreversible. The birth certificate is changed and a new social security card is issued and everything. I wanted to mention that because I've read some false information regarding domestic adoptions, even on here. Unfortunately everyone has heard a horror story, but that just does not happen here if everything is done properly through a reputable agency. Before the child is placed with us (and rights have been terminated) the birth parents call pull out. Definitely. But once it's in our home and ours, it's ours forever.
Did I answer your question? Sorry about the novel. You're all now experts on the domestic VIP through LSS.
Don't apologize! I'm glad you shared all of that. I don't know anything about adoption honestly, especially infant adoption. That's interesting about the being permanant...I've only ever heard the "horror" stories...I'm so glad that's not a possibility.
So each day you get closer and closer...although now you have to wait for a child? Is this the hardest wait? Of course, that's getting a little personal, and I don't want to overstep my bounds. Please forgive me if I'm prying too much
Sandy
_____________________________
The Daily Poop
DustySgt
I my soldier!
Geico saved 15% by switching to Chuck Norris
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 6:40:55 PM
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nicole6598
Posts: 4080
Status: offline
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Hi, just popping on while hubby in shower, then he's coming in here to sleep peacefully for thenext 8 hours... I posted a prayer thingy in baby chat. Last nights sleep was pure rotten. I can't even see straight that's how tired I am, like when I was pregnant and had those black outs. Anyway, if you can, please pray for me and Nathaniel. And grace, she has to put up with me all day.
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Proud Aussie, Wife, Mother, Woman!
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RE: SAHM/W Support - Part III - 8/20/2008 7:41:34 PM
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spitzu
Posts: 1088
Joined: 4/19/2005
Status: online
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Mrs.Wifey
quote:
it will be ours.
Maybe you should call your future child "Bob" or something, because he/she certainly won't ever be an "it"
Actually since the word, by definition, can be used to represent someone whose gender is unknown... yeah, he/she is currently an "it". I personally find it kind of silly to assign a fake name to a child that is probably not yet conceived, and calling it "he/she" is strange. But that's just me. Sorry if that bugs you, but I'm not calling my future kid Bob or a "he/she". LOL
Sandy - I don't know yet if it's the hardest wait, since we're not there at the moment. I can't imagine anything being harder than the past three years, but who knows.
Perhaps it is different in other states, but in Texas, voluntarily terminating your parental rights in an adoption scenario is irrevocable. How could it be anything but? That would be horribly cruel and unhealthy for not only the adopting family but also the child. The only time it can even be contested is if they prove coercion, but these days that is extremely rare, and I'd say probably non-existent with agency adoptions. Private adoptions are more sketchy and you have to be really careful with those and make sure a good lawyer is hired and all your t's are crossed and your i's are dotted.
Kim - congrats on passing!
_____________________________
<- Ahh, the sound of a real shutter. It's like music!
Buggy Again
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