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RE: Geeks Training Facility - 7/27/2008 11:08:53 PM
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mutinywxgirl
Posts: 12579
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: west coast of FL
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Can't add anything as to how to deal with her - just wanted to tell a bit of my story. All my life I lived next door to the homecoming queen. She was the beauty and I was the brains. Well, now, people would consider me with having both.
I have NO problem in talking with guys - I've been around professional athletes most of my life.
There is one, though, who is true geek (and incredibly handsome too). When I commented on being a geek, he said that I was "SO not a geek". So I said that I was a nerd, and he nixed that idea too. I asked him what I was, and he said "just a very kind-hearted person". I said I would accept that moniker. 
Just because you're a geek or nerd or bookworm or into learning, it doesn't matter. People are people. Don't let looks or accomplishments hinder your getting to know them.
As has been discussed in Singles - there are many times when the pretty girl sits home alone because everyone assumes she has men asking her out, when, in reality, the men are too afraid to ask. So, put away your fears and get to know the one who has peaked your interest.
_____________________________
When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.
Lisa is happy THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!
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RE: Geeks Training Facility - 7/29/2008 4:35:43 PM
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rocketman0621
Posts: 11
Joined: 7/28/2008
Status: offline
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I think its important to realize that you don't have a difficulty talking to girls because you are a "geek".
And mind you its titles like that, which can create a problem. Mutinywxgirl had it right when she said "People are people."
I've seen many people struggle with talking to girls. I have a buddy who is a very good looking guy. I mean he's done part time modeling. So he should have no problem with talking to girls right? WRONG! I've never felt so bad for someone. The stories he's told about how things have gone for him make my heart cringe. Confidence is definitely something that affects this. He is just convinced he can't talk to girls, and with that attitude he's right. You need to realize that you can talk to anyone you want to if you choose to. Confidence comes through experience. It's not a gift or something you can just put on. It's a character trait that is completely acquirable. So work on it. It probably won't happen the first or second or even third time. But you will realize that its not something that should be holding you back, and through your successes you will gain confidence.
As for the situation with this girl from church, I'm interested in what it was actually like or about. Were you two alone and trying to have conversation? Or were you in a large group of people and so didn't feel you had her attention? What did you try to talk about?
Just trust that God will bring you the courage when you need it. He's always there and always will be.
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RE: Geeks Training Facility - 7/30/2008 5:19:32 PM
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rocketman0621
Posts: 11
Joined: 7/28/2008
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: jacob011
quote:
As for the situation with this girl from church, I'm interested in what it was actually like or about. Were you two alone and trying to have conversation? Or were you in a large group of people and so didn't feel you had her attention? What did you try to talk about?
Hmm ... mmmm ... eh ... Actually I haven't talked to her at all . I mean I was nearly able to say Hi to her. She replied with certain amount of uncertainty. (at least I felt it... we never had meaningful conversation)
Well in that case, are you sure it wouldn't be "normal" talking with her. If you've only ever tried to say hi, how do you know yet? I think its great that she's in church and involved and stuff. Maybe when you are talking with the other girls you can invite her into the conversation or if she's already involved ask her a question directly. Show that you care. That will make it easier but you will also have the comfort of others around you so you don't feel so much pressure to talk. Meaningful conversation could be something as little as, "So when did you start attending this church?" I mean God is pretty meaningful and your interest in her beliefs and spiritual life would probably help in her comfortableness as well. And don't discredit your walk with God. I'm sure that where you are is great. And if this is supposed to be something that eventually works out, then God will make it happen if its his will. Don't worry too much right now about how christian she is or what not. Singing in the choir doesn't make her a better christian, the same as being a pastor or sunday school teacher doesn't make you more holy in God's eyes. Take it slow and don't sweat it. It sounds like you have a pretty good idea of the situation and where you are.
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RE: Geeks Training Facility - 7/31/2008 12:48:16 PM
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jacob011
Posts: 17
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Coruscant
Status: offline
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quote:
Singing in the choir doesn't make her a better christian, the same as being a pastor or Sunday school teacher doesn't make you more holy in God's eyes.
Yeah I know that. I was just trying to say that here is the main difference between us.
quote:
If you've only ever tried to say hi, how do you know yet?
Good point but I just don't feel to it. I'm afraid that she wouldn't know what to say and eventually might embarrassed herself. (I don't wanna embarrass her.) You know what I mean.
I wasn't trying to discredit my walk with God, just wanted to say that she's godly. No doubt.
From what I observed she's fine with talking to other guys. She's very dear, joyful, compassionate, faithful and diligent. (In my eyes she's very fragile. I wouldn't wanted to spoil her with my talk. I'm not so delicate as her. I listen to rock, hard rock, metal occasionally but I can also get quiet and change my style. I'd also say that I'm not so sociable as her. I see it as an obstacle, ya know. I've had problems with this since nursery school. I've seen those more sociable on a pedestal. I know that's not the reason why should they be something more than myself but I've had negative experiences with them. I was always individualist and always felt expelled by others. (And I really was.) I was always more ripe than my associates. Their jokes and stupid behaviour sad nothing to me that time. Fake smile solved it.) On the other hand I'm not that terrible outcast. 
_____________________________
Dies time, the former life is past
Blind side, I know what awaits my fate
Hates breath, unavoidable ceasing of days
Today is a good day to die
Project 86 - Six Sirens
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) She is twice the christian then I am.
I happen to like one. A lot! 